truck driver humor

At the third red light, the same thing happens again. 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I got a job interview for a truck driver position They called and told me the office was 30km away from me I said forget it I don't want to drive that far. border-color: #cc181e; After a while, the truck driver decides to show him what's what. His website is to help and inspire stepfathers, aspiring stepfathers, and the women who love them worldwide. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot. They are the best you will find. Here is our list of the best jokes for truckers. When he turned and looked at Kevin, he had a smile on his face. } Manage Settings border-radius: 50px; This is a vid of a siri taking back to truckdriver and the agruments is hilarious. longer hours, crowded truck stops, difficulties finding food, in addition to health and safety concerns. The parrot screeches, "No fuck! 10. He thought he would do a good turn and pulled the truck over. One day a trucker got slightly stuck with his load under an overpass on a busy stretch of highway. He was enjoying his meal, when a gang of bikers walked in. Then they stripped me of all of my clothes, took my wedding ring and dro. -moz-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; On the back of his truck was a sign saying, How am I driving?. Turn around now before its too late!. .postid-65275 #text-61{display:none;} Top-ratedtruck financingandequipment financingcompany located in Roseville, CA. So this semi trucker got his truck stuck underneath an overpass. What is the truck drivers favorite part of the movies? As if theyve never spoken before, the blonde says brightly, Hi my names Julie, and I thought you should know youre losing some of your load!. text-align: center; The cops said theres nothing they can do. The first stubbed his cigarette out in the old guy's pie, the second walked past and spat in his coffee, and the last flipped the guy's plate over, tipping the rest of his meal everywhere. display: block; Oscar winner Kate Winslet (Titanic, The Reader) stars in the upcoming political drama The Regime in which she "swears like a truck driver" opposite Martha Plimpton who plays a US ambassador. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-instagram a i { .postid-65275 #text-52{display:none;} } #af-form-1702128069 ul, #af-form-1702128069 ol { The truck driver is huge and has anger issues. Many of them can be played with wheel and brakes too. It was a bloodbath. #trucking #career #mondaymemes, LIKE Progressive Truck Driving School today: http://www.facebook.com/cdltruck #trucking #truckdriver #trucker #career #money #job #jobsearch #Chicago #employment #education #cash #Illinois #school, LIKE Progressive Truck Driving School: http://www.facebook.com/cdltruck #trucking #truck #driver Shipping to Hawaii Truck driver. What do a truck driver and a slightly aroused man have in common? I just got hired as a garbage truck driver. The ones with the long haul ways! . Eat an M&M, bite the cat, move about 3Feet. Close. You make him an offer he cant refuse! Today there are many kinds of games online. It is a big bar. 5. A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. After constantly asking her, she finally agrees to go out with him. Everythings going fine until a biker gang turns up. ", He tells the bartender "give me a whiskey, straight up". .postid-63227 .mejs-controls .mejs-horizontal-volume-slider .mejs-horizontal-volume-total { When Justin did, the driver got out of his truck and pulled a piece of chalk from his pocket. A truck carrying expensive watches spilled on the highway. He pulls over and looks around, but can't see anyone. "Hey, buddy, who are the two biggest morons in America?" }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-f09dty4o4")); You have to take them to the zoo or something.. Whenever he saw a lawyer walking down the side of the road he would swerve to hit him, enjoy the load, satisfying THUMP as he did so, and then swerve back onto the road. When you come home from a two-week trip and hes still trying to back out of the driveway! The same police officer pulls him over again and says, Look pal, I told you yesterday to take those bloody baby ducks to the zoo!, The truck driver says, I did, they absolutely loved it! The cause of deat. Watch this!. ", So, a truck driver stops at a diner for a cup of coffee, a piece of pie, and a chat with the waitress one evening. #NextTruck #Trucks. TopMark Funding Funny Quotes About Truck Drivers Police Humor Quotes Chevy Truck Sayings And Quotes Quotes About Girls Driving Trucks Tow Truck Driver Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes Bob Marley Quotes Bruce Lee Quotes Buddha Quotes Confucius Quotes. A truck driver finds a lamp, and rubs it. Driver: How about my wife liking my family. Truckers are getting into trouble with environmentalists for animal cruelty these days. Biker Shirt: Are You A Son Of Ibuprofen? A trucker gets lost one day and as luck would have it he comes to a the low bridge and gets stuck under it. font-size: 21px; background:#4267B2; I tried to get a shipment of fire hydrants from the factory that makes em, but I wasnt allowed to stop anywhere near the place! Nov 7, 2018 - Explore Tia's board "Truck driver humor/ issues" on Pinterest. Can you imagine what it might be like, he countered with a question of his own, Having eight inches of Snow in June? See more ideas about truck driver, humor, trucker quotes. free shipping. After the class ended, the students were given their final exam. The only thing that annoys the girl is that the guy isnt much of a risk taker. Long haul jokes, 18-wheeler humor, and a truckload of semi funny puns . display: block; Were going to the seaside today!. } Im June, June Hansen, she said. Warning: driver throws things, #weekend #trucker #truckdriver #trucking #weekend #funny, #dispatcher #trucklogs #trucker #truckdriver #trucking, Once a #TruckDriver, always #trucks #trucker #truckdriving #truckerjobs. } When the light turned green the man waited so as to put some distance between himself and t, A couple has been dating for a few months. I tried my best. One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. I want everyone to soberly consider and take responsibility for your life decisions. ~ Dallas County Judge Clay Jenkins, upon declaring a state of emergency in Dallas County and halting all public gatherings for a week. -webkit-border-radius: 50px; When they both had come to a stop the truck driver once again jumped out and started banging on the trailer door. line-height: 15px; By Mmmm3344. Right as the truck driver is starting to get in good with her, his company sends him on a week long job, but before he leaves he brings Sara 7 apples. text-align: center; [Updated 12/11/19] (Based on a joke from Ford Muscle Forums). 5 Fun Truck Driving Games. - Rita Rudner. margin-bottom: 0px; The truck driver perplexed asks the guy, "Come on man, I was just joking. Whats so funny? the truck driver asked. Treat Yourself & Click Now! color: #444; A police officer sees a truck that speeds up as it passes him. enable_page_level_ads: true border: 1px solid #eee; .arqam-widget-counter.arq-col3 li { I highly recommend it. lol..but you can't do that anymore with the electronic log books. The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. portalId: "5258028", A truck carrying construction tools spilled on the highway. [class^="arqicon-"], [class*=" arqicon-"] { A truck driver stopped at a roadside restaurant. #NextTruck #Trucks #Trucking #TruckingHumor, Hope you have a sweet Monday! Warning: Proceed with Caution! I'm from Germany, so I hope it doesn't get lost in translation. He thought it was strange that she wasn't standing near a car, but he picks her up anyway. What did you wanna know about my beard?, the man with a long fluffy beard asks. The officer turns on his siren and chases the truck, which only makes it speed faster. As they pay the bill the first one talks to the waitress and says, That trucker that was in here earlier wasnt much of a man, was he?. The truck driver tells him to lay down in the trucks sleeper compartmentand have a rest. background:#f26522; line-height: 50px; Once again, the truck driver s, A short time later, he saw a lawyer with a briefcase on the side of the road. Here, Ill buy you another drink. } A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three Hell's Angels' bikers walked in. Some of the regulars there noticed him and began sniffing the air. Quotes. Only crush their tiny legs and arms. A tow truck driver is pulling a lady out of the ditch. What was the grain truckers favorite band? text-decoration: inherit; #trucking #trucker #truckdriver #truckdriving #truckdrivingjobs #jobs #cdl #Texas #funny #lol. Search. How can you tell if your wife is cheating on you with a Swift driver? if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'humoropedia_com-box-4','ezslot_4',196,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-humoropedia_com-box-4-0'); One day, as the truck driver was driving along he saw a priest hitchhiking. display: block; A garbage truck. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-twitter a i { It was quite a spectacle. color: #fff; A trucker is eating alone at a diner when three motorcycle gang members walk in and head over to his table. One of our truck financing specialists will contact you as soon as possible to review your commercial truck loan or lease needs and learn more about you and your business financing goals. A police officer is on his tail, lights flashing. 15. "Never have more children than you have car windows.". opacity: .8; He decides he needs a cup of coffee so he pulls into this truck stop. Whats the difference between aPeterbilt and a porcupine? background:#CB2027; But Neil wouldn't be Neil were it that he sings a song every five minutes: "I'm Neil and I fuck behind the wheel". When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. Do you like donuts? 12. color: #fff; 1. Neil is a skilled truck driver and drives the freeway every day. So I have to get a cab home. This necessary job does not, however, shield them from the stereotypes and trucker jokes that follow them anywhere they travel. Country boys got pickup trucks.". On the last day of truck driving school Charlie is taking his test, and the examiner is asking him all kinds of questions. Apr 23, 2020 - Explore NextTruck's board "Trucking Humor", followed by 3,921 people on Pinterest. Excuse me, sir, you are spilling your cargo.. #Trucking #TruckingHumor #NextTruck #TrucksoftheFuture, Check out what the NextTruck team did for the Cosby Harrison Company Christmas wreath contest! display: block; The officer pulls him over and says, Didnt I tell you to take those penguins to the zoo?, The trucker replies, I did, and it was a lot of fun! margin-bottom: 0px !important; I almost hit that lawyer., I know, said the priest. border-color: #45b0e3; .arqam-widget-counter .arq-twitter small { Next day, the officer sees the same truck going 20 below the speed-limit again! So, the next day, the same man is driving the same pickup truck on the same road with the same ducklings in the back, except this time theyre all wearing sunglasses! And then I gave you a 50% bonus for doing it all through the exhaust pipe.. It wasnt long beforea cop stopped by to check things out. "Without trucks, you would be homeless, hungry, & naked.". He'd eat an M&M, reach down grab the cat and bite it, stand up and move about 3feet. var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; He turned around and Kevin was laughing so hard he was about to fall down. Learn about how the relationship between. 10. He finds out that she's quite prudish but he's willing to look past that because she's really, really pretty. As the truck driver was about to start eating , three men in leather jackets pulled up on motorcycles and came inside. She tells him "yes! A truck carrying ten thousand copies of a thesaurus crashed on the motorway. After all, theres no plate like chrome for the hollandaise! Now I mean like he really hated them lawyers. "If it ain't covered in mud, It ain't a real truck.". text-align: center; background:#3f729b; What is the least reliable part of every Swift truck? display: block; Whoever can sell it for the highest price will be worthy of everything I leave behind", Researchers for the Swansea Authority found over 200 dead crows near M4 recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. COPY JOKE. Kevin replied, Every time you werent looking, I stepped outside the circle!!. From around the curve they hear screeching tires and a big splash. } The truck driver promised to take the penguins to the zoo immediately and drove of. Entertainment, Semi Trucks The trucker says back, Youre telling me! Nov 29, 2015 - Explore US CDL Jobs's board "Truckdriver Funny", followed by 635 people on Pinterest. The truck driver was really starting to lose it. A blonde is taking her new sports car out for a drive on the highway. Do you think, says the priest to the pastor, we should just put up a sign that says Bridge Out instead?. $1.75. 2. It was quite the spectacle. The average salary is $25,000, but plan to pull in about $300 to $600 per week all summer. The officer immediately asked the Truck driver to bring the truck aside for a complete check up. transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; Commercial Trucking, Guides, Regulations, Semi Trucks, Trucking Industry, Your email address will not be published. As he was about to eat, three bikers walked in. Learn about how the relationship between donuts and police officers developed and get a few laughs in the process. Liked these trucker jokes? 3. margin: 0 !important; Score: 1. background:#cc181e; The truck was still full of penguins. Enjoy these jokes and puns about truck drivers. The trucker angrily yells at her and motions for her to pull over. A truck carrying money spilled on the highway. Many states and federal agencies involved. 7. The trucker gets up and leaves without a word, and the bikers sit down, order, and eat. font-family: 'arqicon'; When the parrot exclaims, "wanna fuck?" Required fields are marked *. A young pastor walking be asked Timmy what in the world are you doing ? He had sized up the situation and then advised to the trucker to let some air out of his tires, so he could move on. Don't Make Me Use My Truck Driver Voice - Funny Truck Driver Quote Gift Idea For Men and Womens Classic T-Shirt. .arqam-widget-counter .arq-rss small { Moral of the story: Better Nate than lever. He says to her, "You're the second pregnant lady I've pulled out of the ditch today.". He goes in and sits down. 15. A pickup line. Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. With 20+ years of experience in the trucking industry financing and leasing straight and box trucks for owner-operators and fleet owners. Dec 8, 2020 - Everything trucking!. It was a hard drive. Have you ever tried eating egg yolk off of your trucks wheels? Finally, a police car pulls up. The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. The pastor confused said I don't understand . Whenever he saw a lawyer walking down the side of the road he would swerve to hit him, enjoy the load, satisfying THUMP, and then swerve back onto the road. He drew a circle on the side of the road and gruffly commanded to Justin, "Stand in that circle and DON'T MOVE!". fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); (sorry) Can't remember them all. Truck Jokes, Pickup Puns, Trucker Humor. They gotta go the zoo!. The trucker lowers the window, and she says Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load.. hbspt.forms.create({ So with that in mind, heres a collection of really funny truck driver jokes for you.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_13',171,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_14',171,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_15',171,'0','2'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_2');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_16',171,'0','3'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_3');.medrectangle-3-multi-171{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:3px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:3px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:300px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. Hed always enjoyed tinkering with truck engines, so he enrolled in a school for truck mechanics. I almost hit that lawyer.. He pulls to the side of the road, parks, and walks out into the sage brush.

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